normal service will be resumed
When I started this website I had wonderful intentions of a constantly overflowing fountain of exciting ideas and creative projects. I still do hope it might be that one day, but have been learning to accept that life gets in the way of all sorts of things and that is just how it is. It doesn’t mean failure.
We moved house three months ago and whilst I clearly realised that would impact my ability to do all these extra things I didn’t think it would take this long to find a spare half hour to do something this frivolous. There are a few reasons it feels frivolous – one, it’s not house related. There’s still so much to do to the house. Not massive big renovation project type things but just sorting out, getting it to feel comfortable and not just one big mess of stuff. The second is it’s not time sensitive. Since we’ve moved to a house with a garden I’ve decided I’m massively into gardening (add another time consuming aspirational hobby to the list). And I really love it, the whole process of growing things and preparing and optimising really appeals to both my creative and logical sides but it’s also quite timing specific. We watched a bit of Gardeners World last night (Friday night, super excitement levels here) and Monty was explaining all the things you should do this weekend – planting biennials apparently so they will grow later this year but then next year will flower. Oh my god, get online to order biennial seeds and some kind of seed tamper thing that Monty was using because imagine if I don’t and this time next year I wish I had biennials and I have to go to B&Q and buy them when I could have had my own if only I’d been more prepared this time last year! That is a pretty constant stream of thoughts related to all kinds of things – I should do this now because what if…. what if….?
The third is that it is totally frivolous! Who needs a website?! I mean, unless it’s your actual job it’s just a self-indulgent hobby which depending on your motivation might be something you want to do just for yourself or possibly because you have your eye on world influencing domination or similar. My reasons are in the first camp (handy, seeing as I’m not sure anyone reads any of what I write) so it really seems like a totally non-productive way to spend time when I could be, I don’t know, sorting out the 500 skeins of yarn I’ve got which I intend to knit but I never get around to that either. Even the cat has come to sit on me now, which is clearly her way of saying “I can see I’m not interrupting anything important.”
An idea I’m working on for an article is why people enjoy being creative and what it means to them. I really like putting my thoughts down because it helps me organise them, and I like the process of structuring content which I own, not for the purpose of work or an academic assignment. It also helps me focus and feel quite calm and relaxed, which can’t be said of sitting down in a house where every room has a very visual reminder of things that need doing. For other people it has all kinds of benefits and creates communities where people can share and feel part of something.
So whilst yes, I do think it’s bit of a frivolous hobby but I like it, and am now going to make more of an effort now to find the time. Not sure how, but it’s all about trying isn’t it?